Monday, August 15, 2011

Piertotum Locomotor!

"And now — Piertotum Locomotor! Hogwarts is threatened! Man the boundaries, protect us, do your duty to our school!"- Minerva McGonagall, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows part 2

I’m still under the magic of Harry Potter. I know I’m showing again my mentally-deficient side of my personality, but hey, I’m just a 16-year-old kid stuck in this flabby body of a 26-year-old adult.

The world in Harry Potter is no different from ours. It’s real.

Our school is always threatened by a phantom menace greater than the megalomaniac chienne of a dwarf hiding in a hospital under the protective charm of a humongous animated human lard.

Now, even if our schools are given 14% of the national budget by President Noynoy, it always seems like they are on the verge of destruction, extinction.

The lessons and the contents of our books and our history text books are and will be perverted and twisted by the claws of the faithful minions of treacherous soothsayers, imeldific monsters, and other abominable creatures dwelling within the chambers of power in the kingdom of the blind.

All the sage and the powerful from prestigious schools and universities educated by taxpayers’ money will preach great faith in our schools, the martyrdom and heroism of our teachers and our professors, while they continue to cut budgets, eat up all the pork-barrel funds instead of donating it to state universities and schools, build ghost projects and ghost classrooms, set up hundreds of basketball courts and thousands of waiting sheds along roads where no vehicle has ever passed for centuries.

The half-naked half-breeds, debt-ridden socialites, pseudo-half-breeds, the indomitable jejemonic coƱos will take over the land and gain prestige, fame and power, while the pure-bloods with genuine intelligence are either being corrupted or leaving the country.

Real action must be taken. Things must change and it must be done in every possible way- even if it means blood must be shed.

If I’ll be given the chance, I’d chant Piertotum locomotor spell. All grammar-nazis will arise from their slumber, wake from their petrified past existence.

The School is threatened! Wake the youth from their slumber! Slay the forces of jejemon. Annihilate hypocrites in the Senate and the Congress. Kill the greedy and corrupt half-breeds. Eliminate Bieber fans. Save Miriam Defensor Santiago. Do your duty to our School!