Saturday, September 24, 2011

The Artist Death Match: Lady Gaga vs. Charles Bukowski

And the battle is on between the two most beautiful scums of the earth- The Queen of Monsters, Her Royal Highness in her most outrageous regalia Lady Gaga, versus The Laureate of Low Lifeforms of America, Charles Bukowski. Who will win this match?

Their artistic work-

Gaga- compared to her over-rated contemporaries, the Fame Monster is a genuine product of true music and pure talent. She knows how to sing, play the piano, and she can dance as well. No autotune. But instead of being a diva like Mariah Carey or Celine Dion, she opted to create glamourized trashy songs with stuttering lyrics (Po-po-po-po-po-pokerface, Ra-ra-ra-ah-ah, Juda-juda-a-as, see what I mean?). Yes, they're trash, yet amazingly brilliant when she plays them in her piano. In her artistic power, she pulled thousands of her minions out of their shells to become who they were destined to be, little monsters of Lady Gaga's powerful Fame Monster Machinery.

Bukowski- a true writer and poet, but his ascension towards the peak of success was initially blocked by ignorant publishers. His poems and other works are about losers, whores, pimps, criminals and all other underdogs of society. His art is simple in form, but the characters and their stories reflects the profundity of the American reality during his time. The narrator of the dark, the hopeless, the obscene and the dull. His works actually speak to his audience.

Gaga-0 / Bukowski-1- just because Bukowski doesn't stutter in his poems.  


Gaga- an icon not only in music but also in the world of fashion. She destroyed the negative concept of what is strange and alien by giving a new definition, or better, offering a new concept of being a non-conformist and original- TO GO GAGA. That means "be what you want to be". She's the knight in shining armour of the losers of society. Her lifestyle says that dreams come true, even in a fashionably nightmarish way.

Bukowski- Cigarettes, random sex and alcohol. This writer lives just like any other random guy in the streets. He lived how others lived their lives. He was the man of the mass, thus a man of mess. 

Gaga- 1 /Bukowski- 1- because Gaga's story from rags to richer rags appeal so much to her little monsters. Bukowski is the 60's version of emo, and I hate emo's. Besides, both the losers and the powerful love Gaga's regalia.

A masterpiece on love/relationship gone terrible-

Gaga- Bad Romance

Bukowski- Love is a dog from hell

Gaga- 1 / Bukowski 2- in this round it's for Bukowski, he just now how terrible it can get in a bad romance.

On God

Gaga- "I'm beautiful in my way 'coz God makes no mistakes, I'm on the right track baby, I was born this way."

Bukowski-“For those who believe in God, most of the big questions are answered. But for those of us who can't readily accept the God formula, the big answers don't remain stone-written. We adjust to new conditions and discoveries."

Gaga- 2 / Bukowski- 2- Another point for Gaga. She's the curse and blessing. Love her or hate her, you really can't blame the woman who gets her inspiration from God and gays.


Gaga- I listen to Gaga's hype music while jogging early in the morning. 

Bukowski- Hmmm.... I can use the pages of his book to clean myself after a laborious session of sitting on the toilet. However, the paper is not very  comforting to wipe down there.

Gaga- 3 / Bukowski- 2- Definitely one point for Gaga!

Secret Weapon

Gaga- God and gays!

Bukowski- Alcohol and liquor

GAGA WINS! Bukowski passed out.

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