Monday, January 23, 2012

What a Wang!

Do not be shocked if I'm posting something about fashion. No, I'm not turning into a fashion blogger. I wasn't born to be a fashionista. But I do know some stuff about fashion.

Like for example famous designer Vera Wang.
When I saw the photo and the article said that she's 62. 62! With that body?! That's Vera Wang now?!

At first I thought this is some kind of trick. Photoshop!

I checked out other photos of her, and it turns out that she's really.... skinny. Well, what do you expect? She's a fashion guru... she has to be anorexic. 

Here's a photo of her with Kim Kardashian. Beside Vera, Kim kinda look fat. hahahaha!

Martians and Venusians and Random Chuvaness

It is true that men and women inhabit the same planet, but both are simply aliens from different galaxies.

People have been trying to reconcile the two creatures but no matter what they do, the political correctness, of putting men and women together not only as equals but also as similar species, is simply impossible.

MEN AND WOMEN ARE DIFFERENT. PERIOD. Well at least in certain areas of personality.

  1. Guys are emotionally stable. Whatever happens around them, they’re just there. Impassive. Except in the presence of a bed and a girl, that’s the only moment when they get excited. Girls on the other hand can be happy/worried, anxious/happy, bubbly/excited, repentant/vindictive, etc. Their moods can be as diverse and complicated and can be blended together like cocktail mixes.

  1. Girls can be sympathetic and altruistic towards others, while men can be completely indifferent.

  1. Guys are quite possessive and aggressively competitive. Although some women can be like that too. But in the business world and politics, men will crush their enemies no matter what their sex is just to establish their dominion.

  1. According to an article I read, women can be energetic, enthusiasm and spontaneous. In some ways, a party without the girls can really be boring.

  1. Men usually depend on their conscience and rational thinking, that is, if there are still guys who use their gray matter instead of their penis. Women on the other hand are more intuitive and are very attentive to the sentiments of others, and if they used these with their heads also, there would be lesser numbers of girls outsmarted by dickheads.

  1. Girls go in groups because they are naturally sociable. Guys go in groups because they like imitating a pack of wolves. And they’re born that way.

  1. Girls, for some unknown cosmic reason, are very much inclined to be perpetually worried and constantly feel guilty. Men are not like that. That explains the great number of male tyrants and ruthless blood-thirsty dictators. However there are a number of exceptions in the girls’ case- Imelda Marcos and Gloria Arroyo (may they rest in peace soon!).

  1. Guys can have special relationships with their hand and their cars. Girls establish a special bond with shoes.

I can really go on with the list. Many fear that emphasizing differences have serious social repercussions. Again, it’s not really about the gender issue, the battle of the sexes, alien vs. predator thing. Whether we like it or not, we are different. But we have to protect our civil rights, observe our civil duties, and be educated of our privileges. And after that what we need to do is kick out the stupid, the ignorant, and the idiots, then this world would be a better place! 

Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Significant Figures ep. 07- 11.283,30 euros

Hindi yan ang monthly income ko sa trabaho. At mababa pa diyan ang annual income ko.

11.283,30 euros. Yan ang sweldo na nakukuha ng isang Italian senator and congressman. MONTHLY. Hindi pa kasama diyan ang mga expenses nila sa trabaho. Libre din sila sa transportation- train, highways, ship, at airlines. All this time akala ko ang Pope lang ang may special treatment.

Nang pumasok ang 2010, former Prime Minister and numero uno douchebag Italian latin-lover Silvio Berlusconi announced to the people, together with other politicians, both from left-wing and right-wing parties, that EVERYONE MUST MAKE A SACRIFICE FOR THE COUNTRY para umangat ulit ang economy.

So dumating ang inflation rates, pagtaas ng mga taxes ang kung anu-ano pang bayarin naming mga trabahador. Nag-introduce na rin sila ng 2% tax sa mga money transfers, kaya lahat ng mga nagpapadala ng pera sa Pilipinas, maliban sa mga bank fees, mayroon pang tax na dapat bayaran para sa Italian government.

Di bale na. Kakayod na lang ng mas matindi ang lahat para kayanin ang mga financial commitments at burdens na dulot ng greed ng makakapangyarihan.

Hindi nagtagal, ang mga kumag ng Berlusconi government ay bumagsak at napalitan ng mga seryosong leaders. Recently, they released a report about the salaries of our dear politicians. And here are the figures (all in euros)-

Salary- 11.283,30

Housing- 3.503,10

Travels- free

Transportation- 1.331,70

Office supplies and staff- 3.690,00

Communications- 258,20 (monthly)

Computers, technology, etc.- 41,70 (monthly)

Monthly allowance (net) of an Italian politician- 18.776,30

Number of senators and deputies opposed to the report- 95% of the Senate and Chamber of Deputies are opposed. It’s quite a surprise, even Communists and other leftist parties do not agree to the proposal of cutting their expenses and salaries. Hypocrites!

Monthly allowance of French politicians- 13.928, 20

Monthly allowance of German politicians- 12.625,40

Monthly allowance of Spanish politicians- 4.637, 80

Salary of an ordinary labourer- between 900 euros to 1.200 euros (it includes all the expenses, transportation, family expenses, insurances, etc.)

These pigs in Parliament even have the guts to say, “IT’S NOT ENOUGH”.

Hah! The price of leadership.

It's More Fun in the Philippines... sa totoo lang, part 3

It’s really more fun in the Philippines. Alam ko yung mga naunang posts ko ay puro negative at wala nang ginawa kundi maging critical towards my own country.

Despite the appalling corruption and poverty, the twisted mentality and principles of most people, and the jejemons, it really is more fun in the Philippines.

Mahigit sa isang dekada na ako nandito sa Italya. The moment I set foot on Tuscan soil I thought, “I’m never going back, ever.”

Dito ko na ipinagpatuloy ang aking pag-aaral (well, the fact is, tumuloy, tumigil, tuloy, tigil, palit ng course, nagpalit na naman ng course, nag transfer from one school to another… hanggang ngayon ganon pa din). I’ve spent half of my life here. I’ve been to almost all parts of Italy, mula sa hilaga hanggang timog, narating ko na.

Cliché man pero totoo, there’s no place like home.

I want to go back to Calauan, my hometown. I want to see the natural wonders of my province, Laguna.

I miss the Philippines.

Friday, January 13, 2012

It's More Fun in the Philippines part 2- The Meat Market

Here’s another reason to send out to the world why it’s more fun in the Philippines than any other Asian country- we have smart and educated whores. Yes ladies and gentlemen, a meat market of young bloods, barely 18, some are willing minors. Open for business, catering for men, women, gay, lesbians, young and old.

Kakabasa ko lang ng isang article ng Philippine Daily Inquirer about students in the morning pero sex workers sa gabi.

Although it should be noted that the Aquino government boosted up the budget for education and should be praised, the sky-rocketing tuition fee and its relentless soaring upwards has pushed many young people to sell their bodies. Kahit mga UP students, bumigay na rin. You really can’t blame them.

If they really want to finish their studies, then they have to sell their bodies.

Isipin mo nga naman- working would mean lesser time for study, while in the sex market- you would only have to spend a total of two or three hours, and you earn more money.  After that, you can get back to your studies. Kung mag sideline ka nga naman, halimbawa, sa isang fast-food chain, hindi ka lang exploited, under-paid ka pa!

Desperate times need desperate measures sabi nga nila. And most of them are desperate.

I know how it feels to be a working student. Mahirap kumita ng pang tuition, and at the same time, it’s really hard to keep up with your studies especially if you’re aspiring to get high scores and pass the exams.  Unlike them, I can’t sell my body. Wala pang value ang katawan ko. Harharharhar!

Easy money nga naman ang prostitution. Hindi lang pang tuition ang makukuha nila. Others earned enough money for their parents and enough money to buy themselves some trivial vain pursuits like mobile phones and trendy clothes. And if you’re lucky, you’ll get a generous patron who might also marry you or keep you as a mistress/cicisbeo.

Although prostitution is illegal in the Philippines and sex tours are not encouraged or allowed in our country, people tolerate it as if it is the most normal thing around. And I’m not even sure how much effort is being exerted by government officials and politicians to curb and deter this crime. Perhaps it’s the other way around.

And if that’s tolerated, then I guess the sex industry would be the most profitable choice for our struggling youth.

So here’s the perverse equation of reality-

High tuition + no jobs or low paying jobs = desperate youth

Desperate youth + tolerated sex industry + shameful government and politicians = IT’S MORE FUN IN THE PHILIPPINES!

And yes, imagine this- It’s more fun in the Philippines. You get Thai lady-boys, geisha-kuno dancers, but in the Philippines, smart sexy girls would go down on you. Scholars would dance on your lap. Cute college boys would give you the best night of your life in the hottest archipelago of the globe! Yeeaaah meeeen! Welcome to the meat market!

Wednesday, January 11, 2012

It's More Fun in the Philippines.... Daw! Part 1

IT'S MORE FUN IN THE PHILIPPINES- this is the new slogan of the Philippine Department of Tourism to attract tourist to come and have an exciting experience in the country. For a moment in Twitter's history, #itsmorefuninthephilippines was the no. 1 trending tweet. Here are some of the tweets I sent in to promote it-

#itsmorefuninthephilippines you can be religious and at the same time stare at huge billboards of almost naked half-breed "pinoys".

#itsmorefuninthephilippines We have three meals a day, snacks in between, and more snacks between snacks and meals.

#itsmorefuninthephilippines MORE FUN??? Hindi ba dapat FUNNIER?

#itsmorefuninthephilippines Philippines is gay

#itsmorefuninthephilippines ang daming nag circulate na sex videos ng mga artista

#itsmorefuninthephilippines ksi pwedeh powh mgtxt ng gNtoh!

#itsmorefuninthephilippines because our malls and basketball courts can accomodate students better than our real schools. Ang saya!

#itsmorefuninthephilippines Pacquiao will be our president soon. Abunda will be Vice President

#itsmorefuninthephilippines Sarap umihi sa pader pre!

#itsmorefuninthephilippines two words: Kris Aquino

 #itsmorefuninthephilippines bloodless revolt pero blood-bath sa inuman at bagong taon at sa lahat ng kasiyahan! Fun!

#itsmorefuninthephilippines Pacquiao, Pempengco, Pineda- the three ultimate P's of Philippine progress

#itsmorefuninthephilippines Senate debates between intellectuals vs actors/politicians/clowns and squabbiling tards.

Ito yung serious at healthy intellectual debate

Dito nakipag joke time naman si Sen. Pia Cayetano

#itsmorefuninthephilippines Every day is a chance to boost up the population because we're all anti-RH Bill. So fun!

hehehehe! It just happened that I wasn't in a really great mood during that time.

One Down!

A-   Auster, Paul- Oracle Night
B-    Barnes, Julian- Sense of an Ending
C-    Cornwell, Patricia- Post Mortem
D-   Dennis, Patrick- Auntie Mame
E-    Eugenides, Jeffrey- The Middlesex
F-    Follett, Ken- The Pillars of the Earth
G-   Grisham, John- The Last Juror
H-   Hagedorn, Jessica- Dream Jungle
I-     Isherwood, Christopher- A Single Man
J-     Jin, Ha- In the Pond
K-   Kelman, Stephen- Pigeon English
L-    Lewis, C.S.- The Screwtape Letters
M- Murakami, Haruki- South of the Border, West of the Sun
N-   Nin, Anais- Henry and June
O-   Okakura, Kakuzo- The Book of Tea
P-    Patchett, Ann- Bel Canto
Q-   Quinn, Jay- The Beloved Son
R-   Rounding, Virginia- Catherine the Great: Love, Sex, and Power
S-    Simoni, Marcello- Il Mercante dei Libri Maledetti- ok
T-   Tolkien, J.R.R.- The Hobbit- ok
U-   Updike, John- The Centaur
V-   Vonnegut, Kurt- The Cat’s Cradle
W- Waugh, Evelyn- The Brideshead Revisited
X-   Xiaolong, Qiu- Death of a Red Heroine
Y-   Yates, Alexander- Moondogs
Z- Zola, Emile- The Belly of Paris

One down! Twenty-five more to go! I'm not reading these books in alphabetical order. Depends on my mood. 

Currently reading: Jeffrey Eugenides's Middlesex

Friday, January 06, 2012

Einstein and The Fame Monster

Long before Gaga came into the scene with her fear of the Fame Monster, there was this eccentric guy with really bad hair, bad wardrobe and fashion sense, and he was (is) famous for his remarkable knowledge and ability in his field of expertise, and who was also scared/annoyed by his own fame.

“The Drama of Albert Einstein” is one of the most fascinating biographies I’ve read so far. Antonina Vallentin, the author of the book and a very close friend of the scientist, painted an intimate portrait of an exceptional man who would stupefy anybody with his unique perception of his fame, the unfathomable depth of his profound thoughts, and his passionate quest in the field of science and education.

It’s really strange how in the early and mid 20th century, the smart, virtuous, and noble are being put on the pedestal. Now, in the 21st century, we have the greedy, the stupid, and criminals in the most important institutions of our country, glitter-ass-auto-tuned girls are considered talented, incoherent pretentious beauty queens, and actors/scions/oligarchs are now the venerated philanthropist of our time.

Vallentin started her book by describing Einstein’s perception and attitude towards his own fame. He was, at most, indifferent, and sometimes very annoyed by it. He was respected by men of the streets and also of learned men of important academies, kings and queens, and members of various European courts and governments. It all seemed absurd to him because fame was in fact a monster to his eyes.

The author gives you a first-hand observation of the character and the peculiar habits, and the humor of Einstein, since she is one of the people who are very close to Einstein. It’s a window to his soul as it allows you to look at ideas and thoughts about religion, human race, war and peace, his passion for music- all of these from a very close glance at the incarnation of genius. The book is definitely genuine and unique and to read it is like knowing Albert Einstein personally.

I did a quick research to get some information about the author but there isn’t any available information. Strange.

Well according to the jacket cover of the book, she is the author of brilliant biographies of Streseman, Heinrich Heine (sino daw?), Mirabeau (resort ba ‘yon?), H. G. Wells (ah eto kilala ko), and Leonardo Da Vinci (kalapit bahay ko yan).

It says here that she was called “a biographer of genius”. She was born in Poland. It claims that she was remarkably self-educated.  At 17 she entered the University of Lwow or University of Lviv and specialized in art history of the Italian Renaissance.

After her studies she got a chance for a job on the Berlin staff of Manchester Guardian. Years later, she was one of the first women political journalists to be accredited to the League of Nations in Geneva.

I gave it 4 out of 5 stars!