It was the perfect afternoon in spring. It was the perfect villa on a hill with the most spectacular Tuscan view of the hills and cypress trees under a beautiful cloudy sky. It was the perfect wedding. And I was the perfect idiot/masochist/that bastard who’s now licking his wounds like a dog. Yes, I went to my ex’s wedding.
Pumunta naman ako dun ng walang hard-feelings. We’ve already established in my earlier posts na naka move-on na ako at masaya talaga ako para sa kanya. We’re really friends na lang.
Kung sa ibang tao, hindi na sila pupunta sa wedding ng mga ex nila. One time someone told me na bigayn ko naman daw ng dinity ang sarili ko. But I believe in that if you’re in good terms with your ex and if you both belong in the same church, I guess it is only but civil for an ex-boyfriend to show up.
Okay na sana ‘yun nga lang, hindi maiiwasan ang mga biro at kantsawan ng ibang mga bisita. The most terrible moment was when the minister pronounced the traditional question na kung may tututol pa. Tumayo na nga ako sa pinaka likod pero kukulbitin, sisikuhan at gagawan pa ng song line-up ng mga kanta ng desperado. I wasn’t really pissed off or anything. I was quite cool with it.
Kaya ako ganon, siguro dahil na din sa mga pambababoy at kabalastugan ng ibang taong idinudulot sa akin, na akala mo’y ako na ang nagmamaka-awa na yurakan ang pagkatao ko.
Kaya naman sa mga pagkakataon na iyon eh keri na keri ko lang ang mga biro at pang-aasar. If I had it my way eh aawitin ko pa ang dati naming theme song. Pero baka masira ng todo todo ang araw ng lahat. God knows what I’m capable of the moment I try to forget this existence.
So masokista talaga ako (shabu pa!). But I’m really happy for ex. I thought, kung hindi ko pa siya iniwan , marahil ay six years ko na siyang pinaghihintay. I looked around and it was a really great feast and celebration of the joining of two hearts.
At the end of the day I was so proud of myself. Good friends are always happy for your own happiness. And I was really happy for her despite our history. And I was so cool about everything because I had no intention of being a nuisance guest. And I realized that I’ve hardened myself enough to crave attention and insults like a masochistic bitch who so high in shabu that I’m asking to be treated really bad.
Come on! Hit me baby one more time!