Monday, January 27, 2014

Prada-ng Ina Mo With Feelings

I was on my way to dinner with friends in the centre of Florence when I bumped into this gruesome sight.



A long queue of cabs carrying prominent personalities of the city. A black carpet that leads to the grand entrance of a brightly lit boutique, trampled upon by the fashionistas who just got out from Pitti Uomo fashion shows. The glitter and glamour of the socialites. And the fucking filthy rich bankers and politicians, and the goddamn mayor of the city.



It was opening night of Prada.

P*******A WITH FEELINGS.

Unang P*******A WITH FEELINGS- kasi bilang isang ganap na social-climbing-gate-crasher, I didn’t know that there was an event like this. Where were my partners in crime? How could we possibly miss the chance of wearing suit and shoes and gorge upon free food and booze?! Paano nangyari ito?! I looked around hoping that I might see some assistant-of-some-famous-bozo-or-a-powerful-dickhead friend of mine, baka sakali mahigit niya ako beyond the black ropes. No one around. I couldn’t barge into the entrance. I wasn’t even wearing my costume- an outfit with fake brands, hahaha! I resolved not to gate-crash here anymore. Besides, it’s a fashion event. “IT’S A F***ING FASHION EVENT T.G. YOU SIMPLY DON’T BELONG!” said my brain inside.



Pangalawang P*******A WITH FEELINGS- 2014 na at hindi pa rin makabawi ang economy ng Italy. 2015 will be slower. Naipako na lahat ang mga pangako ng Letta Government, hanggang ngayon hindi pa rin ipinapako ang prime minister. Why? A big f***ing why?! And why is Prada opening a store and swarmed by these filthy rich bitches and bastards, flamboyantly showing to the world how financially stable they are as their subordinates and slaves look on.



I was seething with anger. I got hold of one of the guns of the guards there and started shooting mercilessly all the guests of the store. I went up to the corner of the store where the manager was standing and poked out his eyes in front of Wanda Ferragamo. She screamed and suddenly fainted. Next was the mayor Matteo Renzi. I too a stiletto and drove the long heel of the shoe to his skull and smashed his head several times until the brain was sticking it. I was disgusted with it because it was a rotten one.

Of course, I was imagining things while I stared at Wanda Ferragamo and the mayor exchange pleasantries. I successfully murdered the whole gang of filthy rich f***ers in my mind. I was really hungry.

I walked away and went straight to the restaurant. I stuffed myself with food. The rich became more fabulous, we worked harder than usual and taxed by the government more than necessary, and the poor became poorer. And I was full. And everything was fine in Florence again.




‘T***INA THIS TALAGA!

18 comments:

  1. Naimagine ko na ang stiletto ba ay red? Hehe. Ang bonggang ganap nga naman nito! Kung nakapag gatecrash, sobrang bongga din to the nth level! Pero kung nagawa mo yung nasa isip mo, huwaw! It's you already! Haha

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    1. Grabe lately ang mga murderous sentiments ko.

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  2. Allergic ako sa ganitong events... Hindi naman kasi ako sosyal na tao. Ayaw ko ng nagsusuot ng sobrang complicated na damit. Simple is good. Simplicity is already an elegance on its own. Oha.

    T.G., Sigurado ka bang nasa Florence ka? Kasi parang dine-describe mo lang ang Pilipinas sa kwento mong ito eh. :P

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    1. Hehehe! Hindi na talaga nagkakalayo ang Italy sa Pilipinas!

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  3. So glad that I have no problem wearing a dress from Divisoria:)

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    1. I have issues with fashion mommy joy. hahaha!

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  4. tsk tsk.... i feel you... sa mata ng isang tripster guy, anung klaseng gov't kaya ang uubra?

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    1. Wala! Unless we establish my kingdom. All will go well. hehehehe!

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    2. un nga gsto kong sabihin eh. nakuha mo! apir!

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  5. Sabi nga, money is a status. Di ko din trip at feeling ko di ko kaya makisabayan sa ganyang event regardless kung mayaman ako o sobang yaman. LOLs. Pagkain nga sa sosyal na resto nakakatense eh, baka tumalsik ang steak! Sayang. Things should always be money worth at syempre since mayayaman sila,, keber na.

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    1. Well you should gatecrash into one of these events. The food is great and free. hahahaha!

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  6. Money is god for other people. Kung dyan Prada and dinadayo, dito sa atin, Parada lang.. haha. corny. senxa na. :)

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    1. LOL Denggoy hindi ka corny = UBER CORNY ang hirit mo ha ha ha

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  7. It is only temporary happiness :)

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    1. Temporary happiness every now and then is good. I don't mind having them once in a while. Hehehe!

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  8. Edi sila nang mayayaman! Haha.. ganyan yata talaga sa mundong ibabaw.. sasabihing naghihirap na daw ang bansa pero bakit yung damuhong mayayaman eh hindi manlang nababawasan.. hirap na hirap pa kung papaano wawaldasin ang pera nila... pistihanun!

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  9. Hindi ako mayaman, hindi rin ako social climber. Kung may event na ganyan wala rin akong balak umatend or mag gate crash. Pero kung may pambili ako nyan bibili rin ako syempre PRADA yan eh I simply love it patawad ha ha ha.

    I own a Prada purse pero gift/pasalubong lang can't afford naman ako to buy that kaya ngayon pray ko naman Prada boots LOL. Peace TG!

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Sige, sakayan niyo ang trip ko....