Monday, February 24, 2014

Kwentong Modista at Sastre

Dito ko na tatapusin ang mga usapang fashion na yan. Siguro iniisip na ng iba na isa akong social climber (siyang medyo tunay), pseudo-conyo (puede rin), feelingerong fashionistang sosyal (oy hindi ah!), at sobrang angas kung maka post ng mga kung anu-ano bagay tungkol sa fashion industry.

Inuulit ko po, hindi ako maporma o isang trend-setter, at hindi ko po pinangarap na maging fashion blogger. Napag tripan ko lang talaga. Ako ang tipong pinagtatawanan ang mga models, o yung tipong susunugin sa gitna ng plaza ang lahat ng copy ng Cosmo Magazine dahil purong katangahan lang talaga ang laman.

But somewhere down the road, nagbago ang pananaw ko sa mundong ito matapos mabasa ang istorya ng buhay ng mga modista at sastre.

Sa mundo kasi ng fashion mas namamangha ako sa buhay, sa creativity at genius ng mga stylist, ng mga fashion magazine editors tulad ni Anna Wintour, pati ang tinaguriang fashion rebel na si Franca Sozzani (Vogue Italia editor-in-chief), lalu na ang buhay ng mga designers- Valentino and Ferragamo. I wanted to write about the others- Coco Chanel, Yves Saint Laurent, Gianni Versace, and Giorgio Armani, and the enigmatic Karl Lagerfeld.

We always think that it is frivolous. Somehow yes. Yung ibang trend sa tingin ko puro kagaguhan lang talaga. Pero mayroon din na tunay na artist at tunay na obra maestra ang kanilang mga gawa. You really have to learn and understand that fashion is art which you can wear. It’s more than about the beautiful dress or the nice dress shoes. It’s also about craftsmanship and ingenuity

Siguro I’m more of a fashion historian than someone who has real sense of style.

But enough of me. I’d like to end this entry with the words of Her Eminence, the Popess of American Fashion Industry Anna Wintour:

from Wikipedia

I often see that people are always frightened of fashion... On the whole, the people who say demeaning things about our world, I think that’s usually because they think they are excluded or not part of the cool group, so as a result they just mock it. Just because you wear a beautiful Carolina Herrera dress... it doesn’t mean you’re a dumb person. There’s something about fashion that can make people nervous.”

Friday, February 21, 2014

Ferragamo Part 2- The Grand Theory of Female Feet by Salvatore Ferragamo (or What You Wear in Your Feet Is What You Are, or the Size Says It All)

Here's what I learned during my visit to the museum. Ferragamo divided women into three categories.

Category #1- Cinderella Feet

Less than a size 6. Very feminine, loved jewels and everything that sparkle. They love furs also. They constantly need to be loved in order to be happy.

Marilyn Monroe- size 5

Here’s a woman who had affairs. Fame and fortune are not enough. These women need to be assured that they are loved.

Kylie Minogue- size 5

Category #2- Venus Feet

Botticelli Venus
this kind of  Venus or this other one 
or Lady Gaga Venus

Comfortable in a size 6. They’re usually beautiful and attractive although beneath their outer shell they hide a fragile woman who love the simple things in life.

Lady Gaga. Lady Gaga talaga? Hehehe… She always claimed to be sensitive and fragile.

Sarah Jessica Parker

Category #3- Aristocrat Feet

Larger than size 6. Very sensitive but liable to mood swings.

Lady Diana Spencer. Her feet explain it all.

Nicole Kidman- size 9

Ikaw? Ano size mo?

Thursday, February 20, 2014

An Imeldific Trip to the Amazing Shoemaker

It was once said that there’s a little Imelda in all of us- a vain, delusional, shoe-crazed little goblin inside all of us. One day, that little goblin was desperate enough to prompt me to visit the Ferragamo Museum where all the prototype shoes of Hollywood stars, of the socialites, and of the vainglorious are preserved.

The museum was opened in 1995 to the public to show the younger generations the story of the famous shoemaker. It is housed in the Palazzo Spini- a medieval palace built by Pope Boniface VIII. In 1938 it was bought by Salvatore Ferragamo and since then it became his base and main boutique in Italy.

Salvatore was born in 1898 in Bonito, a small village in the south of Italy. Since he was young, he was very keen in shoemaking. Later on, he followed his older brothers in the United States to learn more about the art of making shoes. There he saw that American shoes lack inventiveness and the quality of Italian shoes. He decided to go back to his country to make better shoes without the help of machines.

In 1927, he set up business in Florence and trained apprentices with his own method of crafting shoes. His shoes were renowned not only for the beauty of their design but also for their comfort- they are lighter than other shoes.

He also opened a repair and made-to-measure shoe shops in the US, Hollywood in particular. His first clients were film directors. And it was there his fortune started and later he was dubbed as the shoemaker to the stars as actors and actresses began to order his shoes, such as Marlene Dietrich, Greta Garbo, Audrey Hepburn, Marilyn Monroe, Sophia Loren and later on, the royal houses of Europe.

Some of the old shoes used by celebrities in their movies.

In the museum you will see the sketches of the shoe designs for certain stars and the recreation of their feet in wood. There’s a section that gives you the chance to admire the most fabulous shoes throughout different decades.

There are also interesting screenings of old and new movies where his shoes were employed.

No this is not Wicked. It's Anna Magnaini, famous Italian actress during the golden age of Italian cinema. Dunno why it's green.

Apart from design, his genius is reflected in the use of various materials in making shoes such as corks and tavarnelle lace (a Florentine type of lace) and his chromatic imaginations and the intense colors he uses.

His works were inspired by contemporary art and the artists of his time. It was the ultimate incarnation of the colorful strokes and images of great artists worn by the stars, the rich, and the lucky.

Even today, his legacy continues. But this time, his life, his genius and his shoes are the ones influencing the art and fashion of today.

If Imelda were here, she would be salivating profusely.

Unfortunately, I was able to shoot just a few photos because taking picture inside the museum wasn’t allowed.

Monday, February 17, 2014

The Emperor's Last Clothes

The Emperor’s Last Clothes

“I love beauty. It’s not my fault.”- Valentino Garavani

It’s been six years since Valentino Garavani’s last show. The fashion world has moved on, but it would never ever recover to how it was when the great designer was still rocking the runways.

And it’s been almost a year since I saw a documentary about him. A really sad one. Not because it’s full of tragedies but it was about the last moments, the last days, and the last clothes of the fashion emperor before he took his final bow.

When Valentino was a young boy, he would always dream about the beautiful women of the movies and Hollywood stars. He said that he used to pretend to be asleep and day-dream about the beautiful women. There was never a moment in his life when he wanted to be something else other than becoming an artist who makes beautiful clothes and apparel for women.

My city (pag-aari ko talaga no? hahaha!) Florence played a very crucial role in the fate of the designer. In the 60’s Florence was the international fashion capital and this is where Valentino’s debut took place. After his show in the Pitti Palace, all of the world’s socialites, princesses, and most beautiful ladies were all running after him, begging him to make the best clothes for them.

Here in Italy, it’s impossible for you to not see fashion at work, or anything about fashion. It’s everywhere- in the TV, in the streets, buildings, people both young and old. Maybe this environment somehow injected some small degree of sensibility towards fashion in me (despite the fact that I’m a fashion criminal).

I am no fashionista or trend-setter, but even a jologs like me can tell that Valentino’s creations are simply one of the finest and the best, and simply the most divine and beautiful of all creations by any other Italian designer.

One thing that I noted in the documentary was that Valentino’s second language is French. And when he’s really pissed off he spurts out venomous invectives in that beautiful language. It is really one of the reasons why I’m planning to study French this summer, so that I can enunciate tirades in the most suave way possible.

When he said goodbye to the fashion world, almost all fashion editors and writers were mourning. To them, he was the last of that breed of designers with the glorious background and history of the dress-makers of the magnificent past.

Near the end of the documentary, I watched Valentino and his life-long companion and business partner embracing each other on the runway as my favorite aria “O Mio Babbino Caro” played on. It was romantic, sad, and beautiful. It’s very moving to see someone like Valentino on the verge of tears. The exuberance and beauty of his art will always, and should always be remembered. 

Saturday, February 15, 2014

The Devil's Sister Wears Prada

The Devil’s sister wears Prada too. She doesn’t run a fashion magazine but she’s the director of a fashion company in Florence. And I worked for the Incarnate Bitch, just for two days.

Oo, two days lang dahil hindi ko natiis ang katapangan niya.

There was a vacant job position in their purchasing department. Nag apply ako for the job kahit wala akong working background sa fashion industry (at walang fashion sense din) o ang magtrabaho sa isang corporate company.

I met the Dragon Lady. Imagine Angelina Jolie at 50. That’s how she really looks like. She looks exactly like Angelina, and it was really freaky talking to her. I couldn’t keep my eyes away from her swollen red pouty lips. And take note, natural talaga ang mga lips na ‘yon. Italian women usually have their lips done, and but she’s an exception.

I think she was desperate because from the very beginning she thought that I don’t fit for the job. I didn’t even try to persuade her. Okay naman sakin noon na hindi nako tanggapin pero she took me in anyway. One week daw ang aking probation period.

The first day was like hell. My first job was to translate their clients’ emails from English to Italian. The worst emails were the ones that came from Chinese clients. Bukod sa barok yung English, kailangan mo pa rin ayusin ang word order para makuha mo ang context. It was like in my school days when we were studying Latin, wala ka na maintindihan, kapag na translate pa, wala pa rin sense. Duguan talaga ang utak ko, yun pa lang ang ginagawa ko.

Madami din mga terminologies akong natutunan, so now I know better on how to look at the details of fabrics and designs, and other stuff. Pero bulok pa rin ang trabaho ko.

Ang hirap din mag forward ng mga calls. People from Cavalli, Gucci, Prada, Versace, Bottega Veneta- the whole gang’s calling this company to buy or sell some stuff. And the thing is, all of these glamazons are so impatient. Maiinit lagi ang mga ulo nila. It’s as if they’re constantly having their menstruation- whether the person has a vagina or penis.

One time I almost confirmed a € 100,000.00 order from another company, because I couldn’t understand what he was mouthing. And I wasn’t supposed to entertain that call. The girl in the other desk almost cried out for a pound of my flesh and if she had her way, she could’ve hanged me for such a big mistake.  

All that happened on the first day.

Second day came. Dumating ako sa opisina on time, and I was surprised to see that all the others were already there staring at their computer. 7 AM pa lang nagtatrabaho na sila doon. Da heck! Tulog pa ako ng ganong oras.

Later on I heard a booming loud voice mula sa opisina ni Angelina Jolie. She was so pissed off about something and she was yelling at one of the employees. I thought I was going to faint. It was really scary, I almost pissed in my pants. I went straight to the bathroom.

 Sobra ang pressure sa office na ‘yon. Ako pa man din yung tipo ng tao na gusto lahat easy-going at smooth (unless ako ang superior, I want to make everybody else’s life like hell). She gave me an assignment. Maghanap daw ako ng mga factories na gumagawa ng mga styrofoams. I asked her what type of styrofoams. She looked at we with the fiercest eyes, I thought she was going to struck me down with lightning. She was Maleficent. I crawled back to my hole without waiting from any response to my question and googled down all the factories that produce Styrofoam in Florence. Hindi pala ganong kadali yon dahil may mga sukat at kung anu-anong chuvaness. She wanted to report in the afternoon and place the orders.

Sa tingin ko lumabas din ang dugo ko sa mga sweat glands ko sa takot. After lunch I gave her the list of the factories, yung pinili ko na factory at yung inorder ko. Wala akong idea kung ano ang mga inorder ko. Nagtaas na ng boses si Maleficent, I thought I was going to die. I though lalamunin niya ako ng buhay! She sent me back to my desk.  

Hindi ko na talaga kinaya, so I told Maleficent that I’m quitting. She told me that she’s sorry but I don’t fit in the job. I told her it’s ok, I was just curious.

I literally ran out of the building that afternoon. I looked at the sky and the sun, and the world seemed so beautiful and safe. I felt alive again.

Those were the most intense two days of my life. I’m never going back to Maleficent’s lair ever again!

Every now and then nakikita ko siya. Believe it or not, I still shudder at the sight of her. She messed up with my mind big time. I get goosebumps while writing this.  

Friday, February 14, 2014

Liebster Avant Bjork (…and Rix, Nutmeg Bello and Cher Kat)

Rix, Nutmeg Bello, Cher Kat… ito talaga ang para sa inyo.

I was tagged in three blogs for the Liebster Award. Ang tagal din ng hinintay bago ako nag reply sa kanilang mga tag. Last year pa ako na tag sa awards na ito, but thank you ulit sa patuloy na pangungulit sa akin.

I believe na this one has already made a lot of rounds in the blogosphere so I assume na yung mga gusto kong i-tag eh meron na nito. Kung hindi eh pasensya. I’m ending the link here. Besides, madamot ako sa awards. I won’t pass this! Akin lang dapat ito! BWAHAHA!

As for the questions I’ll just randomly pick some from their questionnaires…

From Rix of Psychorix:

  • Where do broken hearts go?
I don’t know how to answer this. I really don’t know. Kung yung mga broken-heart nga they can’t find their way back home, yun pa kayang destination nila? At kung sila hindi nila alam eh ako pa kaya? Ewan!

  • Do you know where you’re going to?
Hindi. Broken-hearted kasi ako eh. Hahaha!

  • Do you like the things that life is showing you?
Not much. I don’t like life at all. But I just do my best to find some happiness in this sick sad world.

From Nutty Thoughts:

  • Kung ikaw ay isang singer/artist anong bet mong name ng iyong magiging first album at bakit?

Sissy Rocks. Yung name ng magiging rock band ko ang ilalagay ko sa debut album ko. Bakit Sissy Rocks? Minsan dumalo ako sa gig ng isang tribute band ng Oasis. Nag order ako sa bar ng cocktail drink, Purple Haze. I looked at it and said that this is such a sissy drink on the rocks. And there, doon sumulpot ang name Sissy Rocks.

  • Magbigay ng isa sa pinaka paborito mong pelikula, eksena kung bakit naging paborito mo ang nasabing pelikula?

I’ve always loved Moulin Rouge. Ang pinakagusto ko sa mga eksena doon ay yung sa Elephant scene, at yung namamatay na si Satine sa mga kamay ng Christian. I’m a sucker for Nicole Kidman. Bumili pa ako ng DVD at lagi kong  pinapanood. Hehehe!

  • Tumatabo ka rin ba ng gravy sa KFC?
Walang KFC dito.

And from Cher Kat:

  • Bakit ka nga ba ulit nagboblog?
Dahil wala akong mahanap na matinong kausap at maraming tanga sa paligid ko. Salamat sa blog at nakakita ako ng mga taong katulad niyo na kaparehos ko ng trip at hilig.

  • Coffee or Tea?
I drink coffee to survive the whole day. I drink tea when I need some calm thinking. But I’m a coffee junkie most of the time.

  • How do you mend a broken-heart?
Break the neck of the one who broke your heart. Break the leg of the one he cheated on you with. And then you move on by forgetting them while stuffing yourself with ice cream or cocaine or alcohol. And then you actually move on in life, unless you get arrested.

  • What’s your ultimate goal this 2014?
Makauwi sa Pilipinas sa December at magpakita sa ilan sa inyo!

  • What is the theme song of your life?
Siyempre yung all time kong favourite- Eraserheads “Ang Huling El Bimbo”

Para sa ilan na magcocomment please answer the following questions:

  1. Do you want to build a snow man?
  2. Is love an open door?
  3. What’s the thing that you really want to let go?
  4. Halata bang fan na fan ako ng Frozen?
  5. Do you like warm hugs?
  6. Magaling ba mag rap si Deniece Cornejo?
  7. Anong gusto mong itanong ko sa number 8?
  8. (Insert question here and then answer it)
  9. You’re given a chance to spend a one week vacation in Paris but you’re only supposed to bring one of your past boyfriends/girlfriends. Sino ang isasama mo at bakit?
  10. Magkano ang budget mo para sa Valentine’s Day?

Tuesday, February 11, 2014

Bjork Avant Gaga, (this program is going to be followed by The Liebster Award)

I’m a Little Monster…. Ok a Big Fat Little Monster. Gaga is the best thing the pop music scene. No, I have no sympathetic sentiments for Rhianna or Katy Perry or whoever else. I’m exclusively Gaga’s.

Pero minsan nang napatambay ako sa blog “The Nutty Thoughts”, may nabasa akong entry about Bjork. She was one of the prominent and unique music artists in the late 90’s.

Ladies and gentlemen… this is Bjork. For more info, go to Wikipedia or consult Nutmeg Bello because he’s Bjork’s biggest fan here.

Sabi ko noon na Lady Gaga started a new era in the music industry. But I failed to realize who is the real precursor of all these kagagahan. It was Bjork. If Lady Gaga to the modern music industry is like Martin Luther to the Protestant Movement, then Bjork is like Savonarola, who planted the early seeds of gaganess. Yes, only priests, bible scholars and protestants would understand this.

But anyway, all I’m saying is nasimulan na ni Bjork noon pa ang lahat ng mga kagagahan.

Before the trashy lyrics and the redundant syllables in Lady Gaga’s songs, there was the poetic electronic dance music of Bjork. Way back in the late 90’s (one more mention of this at mapaghahalatang matanda na talaga ako), Bjork’s music was totally unique and outstanding. Her lyrics were poetry- I couldn’t understand a thing (except for one of her song ‘It’s Oh So Quiet’). She’s a diva on the stage. And you simply can’t get enough of her.

Before Gaga’s meat dress, disco stick, and all her flamboyant regalia, there was Bjork’s Swan Gown. 


Before Gaga’s pro-gay marriage campaigns, there were already the political movements endorsed by Bjork.

Bjork for Tibet's freedom from China

Before Gaga’s Machete Kills cameo, Bjork was an actress in the Cannes Film Festival Award-winning movie Dancer in the Dark, directed by movie genius Lars von Trier.

So if you’re a Gaga-hater and blaming all these kagagahan on Lady Gaga, well, she didn’t start the fire. Blame Bjork! Hehehe! But no of course. Don’t do it. The two ladies are simply the best.


Monday, February 10, 2014

Après Moi, Les F***ing Hipsters

In the beginning there was Tripster, the alpha nerd. I have been wearing nerdy glasses since I was 16. Poetry was in my blood. Reading is my ultimate addiction. I’m not the conventional dresser because I am a total fashion criminal. I only wear cheap clothing because I am actually stingy and poor. Hindi pa uso ang digital camera at photoshop nag venture nako sa photography and soon abandoned it kasi magastos noon ang photography, and like what I said earlier, I’m very stingy. I always have messenger bags- one eco-bag made of lotus leaves, a black one which I use everyday, a brown leather one which I use for special days. Always carrying with me a book, Moleskine notebooks, my hatred for the world, and a piece of shitty sarcasm for humorless dim-wits.

I often listen to indie bands. Eraserheads lang ang nagdala ng mainstream sakin. What the majority like, I will sometimes hate with ardent passion.

Après mois, les fucking hipsters.

So what’s my problem with hipsters? They’re f***ing posers who stole our style. We, the alpha nerds of the 90’s, have always been the non-conventional type of human beings. We never claimed to be hipsters because the true and genuine hipsters flourished in the 1940’s. And most of them are dead now. There’s no actually ‘we’. People like me never organized a sub-culture group. It just happens that in a community of human beings, there are always the lone nerds, and I am one of those few special breed.

Our look has always been ridiculed. Well, at least the geeks. Nerds are somewhat different. Sometimes respected. Sometimes feared. But most of the times, hated. It was due to my political prowess in highschool that I never got bullied (a politician is always a friend of everyone). I was considered a freak because I don’t normally do what others do. And yes, I am a freak for so many other reasons.

Apart from nerd, which is a pejorative then, and even now I think, there is no other word to classify or describe people like me. I often describe myself as anomalous.

In 2010, designers and fashionistas picked up some thick-rimmed glasses and declared NERD IS THE NEW COOL. P***ngina much with feelings ha! Tatawanan nila noon tapos glorified na ngayon?

So now, I’m supposed to be the coolest person on earth. But no! The nerd look was given the name “hipster”. They wear glasses even if they have perfect vision. And for the sake of being trend, they would carry poetry books, write sloppy poems, but some are just plain boring dim-wits who are fabulously clothed with supposedly thrifty apparel (which is NEVER cheap) from “thrifty” shops (they’re actually shops selling vintage-like clothing with shitty sky-rocketing f***ingly impossible prices).

Now they also have beards, unbelievably skinny pants, tote bags, and they’re anorexic skinny. What’s with being skinny? They only eat organic food. Yeah, some organic sh*t like weed. They can’t shove down a steak in their thin throats.

These are some of the elements which disqualify me from being described of something that came from my very essence.

They say it’s a lifestyle, it’s their sub-culture. But it’s just really about the look. The effing look.

They keep on saying that it’s all about being just you and individuality, but they’re all together like a herd of bleating sheep. It’s all about appearing to be something. Why call them hipsters when they would be perfect if they’re called “f***ing posers”?

I want to kill a hipster today. Trip ko lang.

Friday, February 07, 2014

Desperadong Trip

Napadpad ako minsan sa Alfabeto della Mia Vita ni Geosef Garcia. Nasabi ko na nakakamangha talaga ang human nature, magagawa natin ang mga bagay bagay na iniisip natin minsan na hindi tama out of desperation. Desperadong trip kumbaga.

Minsan lumabas ako noon ng late sa trabaho. Wala pa noon akong kotse kaya dun ako naghintay ng sasakyan pauwi sa bus stop malapit sa workplace ko. Sa gabi hotspot ng sexcapades yung area namin. Madaming kalapating mababa ang lipad.

May tumigil na sasakyan sa tapat ng bus stop na tinatayuan ko. May bumaba na lalaki at nagtanong kung magkano daw ba? Akala ko naman yung bus ticket ang tinatanong niya. Na-realize ko na lamang na napagkamalan akong lalaking bayaran.

Sa isang banda, flattered ako dahil mabenta pa pala ako sa meat market kahit wala masyadong meat. Hehehe! Sa kabilang banda, eh desperadong tao na lang talaga ang lalapit sakin para bayaran ako for sex. Imagine mo si Michael V. bilang male prostitute. Ganon lang ako! Hahaha!

This is just the first. Nasundan din minsan ng isang middle-aged woman. I don’t mind cougars hitting on me. Ok yon. Pero wag naman yung parang maluwag ang turnilyo. Nakatambay noon ako sa isang bar. Bigla naman nilapitan ako ng isang cougar. Ang daming tanong. Ang kulit! Hindi naman ako interesado dahil medyo kakaiba din kasi ang dating niya eh- NOT IN A SEXY WAY. Lumayo na lang ako.

Sa panahon na iyon, gusto kong tingnan ang sarili ko sa salamin at tanungin ang sarili ko- mukha ba akong parausan ng mga taong desperado? Mukha ba akong easy to get kaya ako nilalapitan ng mga freaks? Nakasulat ba sa mukha ko na sasakyan ko ang mga desperadong trip? I may be alone all the time and single for almost four years, but that doesn’t mean I’m sad and desperate? The things people do when they’re desperate! Wish ko lang na hindi ako dumating sa ganoong punto.

Kung siguro nasa desperate akong situation at the time, baka pumayag na din ako magpabayad sa lalaki, on the condition na handjob lang for 50 €, o maka one night kasama si senyora- puede naman din ako sa mild bondage (nyahaha!). Nakakatakot lang talaga lumabas kasama ang mga ganyan. Hindi mo alam, baka desperadong alagad ni Dahmer ang mga yan.

Matagal na yang mga yan. Ngunit kahit anong flabby ko ngayon, as long as may mga taong desperate, kakayanin ko pa rin maibenta ang aking katawan, dahil walang matabang tao sa mga nangangating desperado! Eeeewwww! Hahaha!