Speaking of “Menor Issues”, hindi naman ako nagkaroon ng mga ganyang issue sa buhay. In my almost 29 years of existence, I never had a major major event in life. Napaka uneventful, due to the fact na I came from a conservative upbringing and that my family has a particular religious predisposition that made each member an above-reproach citizen and human being. So sexploits are virtually non-existent.
Hindi naman kami alien. Tao din naman ako. We’re just particular people. I’m a particular person. I could be boring and bland to your taste but I can still spice up things in bed you know. All I want to say is that I’m human too just like anybody else, but with proclivity towards sexual abstinence at celibacy.
I have established in my previous posts that I am attracted to people who are 5 to 10 years my senior. Kung 30 ok lang, malapit na rin ako sa edad na yan. Kung 40 ka na eh malakas ang appeal sa akin niyan. Kung 50, my hugis pa at maayos ang maintenance, at well-established ang career, eh malakas pa rin ang appeal. 55 and above.... we can be good friends. Hahaha!
It’s not really about the money. There’s a certain wisdom and confidence in people who are 5 or 10 years my senior that I find really attractive and sometimes quite sexy, lalu na kung may physique pa silang ipagmamalaki. Sabi nga sa American Pie 1 “Women, like a fine wine, get better with age.” Yan ang mga mapupulot mong aral sa mga katarantaduhang comedy movies ng US.
But there was one time that I went really crazy for a minor. Sexually attracted talaga non ako sa kanya at sa tingin ko eh kapag hindi ko nilandi siya eh masisiraan talaga ako ng bait. 17 pa siya noon. With the way teenagers dress up today, nagmumukha silang mas matanda sa edad nila at sa YOLO culture nila eh mas malandi pa sila sa akin noong 17 ako.
It all started as a little crush. Ok lang naman. It’s natural. Pero nung nagtatagal eh umiinit ang flame. Naging object siya ng aking sexual fantasies. To make things worse, distant relative ko pa, eh it feels like incest pa rin kahit malayong malayo siyang pinsan. My family, known as the House of Tempest, ay itinuturing na nakailalim sa isang household kasama ang kanyang pamilya, so we grew up to consider them as close relatives.
I was really ashamed of myself. I felt horrible because I was standing near the line that separates a horny guy and a pedophile. And it felt really wrong. Unlike others, I always try to run away from my sexual urges, especially if I feel that it is wrong. Not that I’m saying it is sinful (well, it depends on how you will act upon it), but I’m really scared of what I can do with it, and what I will do with it. Naniniwala ako na ang sex ay nakalaan sa dalawang consenting at responsible adults. 17-year-olds are not responsible or aware of their own choices and actions. Ang mga twentysometing nga eh puro palpak sa mga decision nila, eto pa kayang menor na edad na ito.
It was really a dilemma. Lalo nga lang ako nahihirapan kapag nilalayuan siya. Lalong tumitindi ang tawag ng laman. So I decided to face my fears.
One time nilapitan ko siya. Nagkakwentuhan kami more than usual. Suggestive touches and some squeezing.
And then, all the sexual attraction was gone. Na turn-off lang ako sa lack of substance ng aming conversation. Nasabi ko minsan sa isang ka chat ko (I really miss chatting with you Senyor! Hehehe!) na kung wala din namang substance ang kausap ko eh hindi naman din ako tinitigasan. Hahahaha!
I guess, this time, other people’s low intelligence saved me from myself. Hahaha! Hindi naman siya bobo. Pero bata pa lang talaga siya.
Every now and then, pumapasok pa rin siya sa pantasya ko UNTINTENTIONALLY. Medyo ok na rin kasi hindi na siya menor de edad. Yun nga lang. Kapamilya pa rin. So nevermind na lang.
Basta maghanap ng lang ng mature, sexy at may money. That’s the real thing!