Tuesday, January 30, 2018

When in Doubt, Vote for the Pogi

It’s already election season here in Italy. One of my favourite seasons of the year. Bullshit-monger kasi din ako. Hahaha!

So as usual, political parties have engaged all news outlets and social media platforms to channel the same old shitloads of promises which they are determined to ignore or break in two or three years after being elected in power.

Recently I posted a shout out on my Facebook account one criterion for voting that all Italo-Filipinos should consider- and that is to identify which political party who, in 15 to 20 minutes gave away millions of tax-payers’ money to banks who were presumably having financial difficulties, while debated fiercely in parliament for years and asked if they should give enough money for healthcare and education. FUCK YOU DEMOCRATS AND FUCK YOU TOO MATTEO RENZI. 

But if you are overwhelmed with the issues of the day and can’t find any reason or criterion to vote for a candidate, or even the will to go out and vote- here’s my piece of advice. Vote for the handsome/cute or the beautiful. You can’t go wrong.

So ladies and gay men, here’s my candidate for you… LUIGI DI MAIO

In a beauty-deficient field, it’s quite a treat to see a politician with good looks, especially here in Italy, where there are so many politic figures who are centuries old.

And here comes Luigi di Maio, vice president of the Chamber of Deputies, and the front man of the emerging and fierce political party Movimento 5 Stelle (the 5-star Movement).

They’ve been cutting out the bullshit in Parliament ever since they entered the political arena. There have been some internal issues and problems with their members in the recent past, but they do not hesitate to lay them off and send them away packing, something that really shook me. Usually political parties remove an erring member from office only to be put back again after two years, but with a higher position and better salary. Fucktards. Parliamentarians of his party are the only ones willing to cut down salaries of Parliament members so that government can save money (Italy has the highest paid legislators in all of Europe).

His party is different. And he is different because he’s smart and I find him cute. Young, dark skin, smart, and already wielding political power and prowess- goodness I’m having furious orgasms. I really like men in power. Of course they have to be good-looking. So Trump is out of the question. Lol!

Well, what can I say? I am the kind who judges a book by its cover. 

Friday, January 26, 2018

Geography is not the subject today...

Geography is not the subject today. It shouldn’t even be the issue today.

So Mocha spit out another one of her many sensational bullshits (I’ve been repeating this word a lot recently, just to show how much we have it around us), and this time it’s about Mayon volcano’s location.


While it’s unthinkable that a government official has poor knowledge of Philippine geography, I still wonder why there is so much brouhaha happening around Mocha’s statement.

How about calling out judicial institutions to dispense justice for the Fallen 44? How about calling out former President Noynoy Aquino to grow some balls and take responsibility about the messed up coordination of the operation? What about the fucking Dengvaxia?

I do understand you. I do not like Mocha too. But she’s there. What else we can do? What we can do is to make her accountable to her real boss- the people of the republic, not the State Bully and his gang. Call her out to bring attention to important issues. Let us not waste her time and tax-payers money by making her apologize for her geographical mishap or justify her lack of knowledge of geography.  

Thursday, January 25, 2018

Crappy News- Daily Bread

Fast-food is crap but we still eat them because they comfort us. Porn is filth but you still watch because it helps you from not raping anybody (I believe that Mary Palm moments can keep you sane). PUV’s are a threat to the environment and to your life but you still take the jeepney, MRT, the bus, the train because they still take you from point A to point B. Smoking is annoying and it can kill you and the kids and people around you, but you really don’t give a fuck because smoking is for not giving any fuck at all. So why avoid the crap you see on TV or the bullshit you read in the newspapers, when you’ve been taking in so much other crap for your body and daily routine?

Strange isn’t it? We can tolerate life-threatening products, carcinogenic compounds, and death-defying routines (i.e. riding PUV’s), but we do not have the strength to tolerate the news of the day. For some reason, they can overwhelm us- body and soul. We can watch 3 hours of Kris Aquino’s bullshits and savour them all (finger-licking good), but not a word about senate hearings or the recent announcements from Malacañang.


Because they are all the same crap that we’ve heard ever since those white conquistadores were welcomed by the ever hospitable datu’s and rajah’s of our islands. And we keep on hearing the same old names, seeing the same old faces, listening to the same old promises, and still living the shitty life in a shitty community, in a shitty country with a shitty economy, and many other shits. Same old crappy news, but different shade and different level of putrefaction. And that’s how crappy news are served to us all the time.

It’s really exasperating, and many of us have become apathetic. Thus, the emergence of the likes of Kris Aquino, because we have to admit it- she’s emanating so much positive vibes as she recounts to the common Filipino her lipsticks and their different shades of pink, Bimb’s latest comic review (now considered real critique), and her love for thousand-dollars-worth hand bags. Or give fucks about the Kardashian.

But you know what? WE CAN’T AND WE MUST NOT AVOID CRAPPY NEWS. It must be our daily bread.

It is a must for citizens to be informed, and at the same time it is important for us to ANALYSE and READ MORE about the issues of the day. It is high time that many of us come out of the shadows of blissful ignorance and stray away from the bleating herd of stupid sheep that just follow one social trend- repeat the bullshit and bully the differently opinionated individuals.

And now I’m being preachy, spewing bullshits here. Sorry. But the very reason why networks are so confident to share fake news is because they know very well that we allow them to fool us easily. The very reason why political bloggers, politicians and cabinet officials get away with what they say is because no one dares to speak out his mind and call out stupidity. We have relinquished our right to truth. Instead we accept fake news. We allow stupidity. We close our eyes and ears to truth.

It’s time to cut the crap. Be informed. Ask questions. Read more. Educate yourselves. 

Tuesday, January 23, 2018

Signs That You Are a Social Bullshit-Monger

Do you like politics? Then you are probably like me, a bullshit-monger. Well, I have to admit, I am a former bullshit-monger. I have changed my ways since late 2016. I stopped watching the news or reading the newspaper. I am as ignorant as the average young people in our colleges today, except for the young bullshit-mongers who are now nurturing their uncanny nature.

So what is a social bullshit-monger? He is a person who hoards a lot of information and stories about current events, news, political stories and histories, that he allows all these elements to affect his life and health, and eventually, suffer for it, and then feels that he has to moral and social obligation to pass all this information and insight to others like himself, or those people who do not want to engage with the realities around them.

So I was one of those people. I was that guy who posts his rants on Facebook about political issues. I was that annoying person who ruins the pleasure of scrolling down the newsfeeds of your Facebook account because of his posts of news and blog entries about politics. Nakaka asar di ba?

I have decided to stop being one because of mainly two reasons:
  1. High blood pressure
  2. The state of stupidity is overwhelming, it suffocates me

So what are the signs that make you are a bullshit-monger?
1.      Your breakfast is coffee, newspaper, and bitterness.- yes, you like bitter things in the morning, and you don’t mind having a foul mood after that lousy breakfast. It prepares you for a morning debate with the cab driver, or with your fellow tambays at the coffee shop or in front of Aling Nena’s store.
2.      Mainstream Media is Holy Truth- You have full trust and faith in our mainstream media. You don’t even use your common sense anymore. Doing any further research or reading about an issue for you is an exaggeration. You prefer listening to the opinions of scholars who specializes on one side of the story.
3.  Politics is your favourite theme on dinner tables, drinking sessions, and casual chit-chat. You just can’t stop talking about what you heard over the news that day, or what you read from the papers, or what Mr. Politician declared on TV. It’s your favourite topic. You even failed to asked about the health of your sick cousin or the schooling of your pamangkins and godchildren.
4.      You’re a Dutertard or a Yellowtard- You venerate the leaders you are supporting. Nothing wrong about supporting your leaders, it’s just that you should also be free to criticize your own leaders and not feel like it’s blasphemy if you say a different opinion especially when you detected a bullshit. But because you venerate them like the Father Creator in Heaven or like the Messiah, you wouldn’t even dare. So you just keep on repeating the same bullshit until you believe it.
5.      Bloggers’ Words Are True- Nothing is true about us bloggers. We are also selling things. We try to sell our ideas and our opinions. Nothing wrong about that. Readers must be able to judge what is right and wrong, or even do research and call out what is wrong. But bullshit-mongers being true to themselves, they pass on the blog entries as gospel truth. 

6.      You Run After Politicians Like They Are Celebrities But Ignore Piolo Pascual or Anne Curtis- Politics is showbiz for you and your favourite series is the live streaming of the Senate’s plenary session. Stop it. It’s pathetic.

7.      You Join the Bandwagon of Revisionists of Philippine History- you ride with them in their bandwagon of loads of shit, enough to bury the truth and all things true about our history. But then, who really cares, right? Anything can happen in the Philippines- truth-sayers die and thieves become saints. Heroes are forgotten and tyrants lay peacefully among his victims, equally honoured by the people.

8.      Election season is your summer- It’s like vacation for you, the best you’ll ever have every three years.

9.      When your stuck in traffic, you listen to the news on the radio instead of a relaxing tune- You’re already furious about the traffic, then you’ll listen to the latest bullshit of the House Speaker. Truly there is something wrong with you. 

10.  You believe in the political opinion of your religion- I’m not gonna comment about this any further. This one deserves one blog entry. But there’s so much bullshit being preached from the pulpit, especially in Christian churches. Yes Christians, you are no different from the stupid Muslim extremists and the Talibans, and other Christian cults and the Roman Catholic Church. 

There are many more, but these are the most common things I used to do. If you are just like me before, I think it’s time that you should stop. In a time when there’s more bullshit around you than the zit in the face of an average pimply teenager, you need to stop for your sake and the sake of mankind.

Time to breathe the fresh air. Try appreciating Kris Aquino. And listen so some classical music or funny radio talk shows while stuck in traffic!

Wednesday, January 17, 2018

Ode to My 13 Years (Turning 14) of Unrequited Love

This is the story of how the song “Linger” became one of my obsessions.

Originally, the song was about Dolores O’Riordan’s first serious kiss, a song of regret and her falling in love with a soldier.

I liked the song a lot. And then I met my bestfriend in the summer of 2003. I started falling for him since then and eventually realized that I was already in deep shit in love with him the following year. And the rest is history.

The lyrics of the song suddenly had a different meaning. And the music was like enveloping every aspect of my being. Every word was impressed upon my heart, that sometimes when I listened to it, driven by teenage hormones, I would cry a lot and sometimes bang my head on the wall because I felt so stupid and I was deeply in love with a straight guy.

Linger was the song that best described how I felt back then, and even now.

“But I’m in so deep. You know I’m such a fool for you.
You got me wrapped around your finger,
Do you have to let it linger?”

Like Dolores, I fell in love with some guy, not even the most handsome or the most fascinating, but for some reason I love him, and I regret it so much.

This M.U. (mag-isang umiibig) status is already more than a decade but I still can’t get over my bestfriend. That’s what love is for me- suffering in silence. I believe that this is one of the main reasons that are holding me back from having a real relationship. It’s really stupid. As in THAT THING CALLED TANGA NA. Tangina talaga. 

Tuesday, January 16, 2018

This Week- Ode to Dolores

First time I heard that distinct voice of Dolores O’Riordan was in the early 90’s when the song “Zombie” conquered pinoy radio stations. She was out of the ordinary. In the commercialized music trends of the 90’s, she stood out as the rebel. I loved it.

The Cranberries was one of the many icons that heavily influenced my youth, especially during my “poetic years”. Deep in the night, I would listen to their songs and I would write my first collection of poems of my puberty. They were no good. But I found solace and company in poetry and Cranberries music. And I did bag some prizes in poetry contests for awkward young people, thanks to Dolores. 

Dolores was a muse to me, an inspiration and a hero. She was part of my youth; part of my growing years.

I always listen to their songs, even now. And now that she’s gone, I just can’t stop my eyes from shedding some tears. I myself am so surprised. I know it sounds really cheesy and exaggerated. But it really made me so sad. I’ve never seen her or even spoken to in her person. But her death is such a great personal loss to me, making me realize how much she has influenced my soul.

I love you Dolores. Thank you for everything. Thank you for saving us from ourselves. Thank you for the music.

 When You're Gone

Hold onto love, that is what I do now that I’ve found you.
And from above, everything’s stinking, they’re not around you.
And in the night, I could be helpless. I could be lonely
Sleeping without you.
And in the day, everything’s complex. There’s nothing simple
When I’m not around you.

But I’ll miss you when you’re gone.
That is what I do. Hey baby!
And it’s going to carry on, that is what I do. Hey baby…

Hold onto my hands, I feel I’m sinking, sinking without you.
And to my mind, everything’s stinking, stinking without you.

And in the night, I could be helpless,
I could be lonely, sleeping without you.

And in the day, everything’s complex.
There’s nothing simple, when I’m not around you.

 But I’ll miss you when you’re gone.
That is what I do. Hey baby!
And it’s going to carry on, that is what I do. Hey baby…

Friday, January 12, 2018

Call Me By Your Name- Not Another Coming-of-Age Gay Romance Novel

Before the movie came out, I already had a copy of André Aciman’s novel. Never had any particular interest in it until I read all the reviews about the movie.

I don’t like coming-of-age stories because they always make me glum and lonely. And I don’t like romance novels because I find most of them quite cheesy.

“Call Me By Your Name” is an exception. Yes, it is a coming-of-age story, a summer romance love story between a precocious 17-year-old teenager and an adult guy, another gay story. It has all the elements of those cheesy romance stories- summer, hormone-driven, and beautifully set in Italy.

But I loved reading it; every part of it. Sweet, sensual, and sad. These are the three words that come to mind whenever I think about this story.

It’s emotionally engaging, sensual, and powerfully moving. Aciman delves into the sentiments and thoughts of someone who is crushing, desiring and lingering for another person, another body to feel and to taste, another soul to love. Yes, his words and the way he describes human emotions cut deep into the soul of the reader. I was much moved.

It’s about discovery- the intensity of same-sex attraction, the intimacy of two male bodies, the longing of the seeking-soul in finding another, understanding love and fear, and eventually, grasping the reality of loss and heart-break.

It’s funny how a summer love that has touched the lives of two people can leave behind so much hard-to-forget moments. It’s like the song- the first cut is the deepest. Indeed, when it cuts you, it’s so deep that you are still left bleeding after so many years. I’m saying this because, I may have moved on, but the cut is still there- deep and still bleeding. And I’m digressing

Anyway it’s the first book I finished this year and my first goodread.

Grab a copy, or better, go out and see the movie!

Saturday, January 06, 2018

Another New Year's Set of Resolutions/Goals (Nothing New, Same Old Failures, But Perkier and Slutty)

Aaaaaand here we go again! Another start brimming with so much positivity and possibilities, and all that vibes of being able to achieve a new set of goals for this year. Only to look back again and see how we have failed miserably.

My 2017 goals? All kaput. Except the travelling part.  I won’t even bother analyzing what went wrong or what excuses I made not to do them. Let’s just be honest. We almost do not reach our goals because,  1)they are not fucking interesting and we are doing it out of necessity, so it is 2)not fun, and 3) we are behaving with First-World-Issues Syndrome (lame and millennial excuses).

But I am different. I am consistent. I still write down some of the old resolutions or goals only to fail again by the end of the year. And who cares? At least one makes a plan. He who doesn’t plan, plan to fail. Right?

So here’s what I would like to happen this year 2018 and I hope the universe would stop fucking me up.

Goal #1- Be fit and healthy (for the nth fucking time)

I need to get together my act now. I need to look good and get laid more often. Because alcohol will soon not be enough to let people see how attractive I am.

Goal #2- Write more.

Yeah. I had more time at work, going to places, and Mary Palm moments. Like too much.

Goal #3- Read 20 Books

I enlisted myself again in the Goodreads 2018 Reading Challenge. I failed last year’s. Again, no time. So from 24, I’m putting it down to 20. Aside from that, some of the books that I got last year were quite boring. Hope to get some good reads this year.

Goal #4- Learn to cook

So I can eat better my dear.

Goal #5- Learn French

So I would know what to say when I want to give a French guy a blowjob.

Goal #6- Focus more on my little business

I have decided to not become the one sponsored but become the ultimate sugar daddy and buy myself a cute piece of ass.

 Where is human and spiritual progress in all of this? I threw it away in the bin together with 2017. Good riddance. Hahahaha!

Let’s have fun. Don’t take life seriously. It’s a bitch. Let’s kick it in ass, shall we? Happy 2018!